It’s more important to develop a fundamental set of abilities that enable people to deal with life’s inevitable obstacles, according to Harvard’s Centre on the Developing Child, than it is to focus on academic performance and extracurricular activities.
All of these competencies fall under the category of executive function abilities, which we employ for self-regulation.
While children (and adults) can and do learn skills throughout their lives, according to Boston Children’s Hospital paediatrician Claire McCarthy, MD, and assistant professor of paediatrics at Harvard Medical School two stages are particularly crucial: early childhood (ages 3 to 5) and adolescence/early adulthood (ages 13 to 26).
The acquisition and application of these abilities can help prepare kids for success within these windows of opportunity.
In case you’re wondering what to do and when to step back, here are some suggestions:
Planning: Being able to make and carry out concrete goals and plans. A strategic plan is a tool that moves your practice toward a goal you have set.
When kids are young, it’s normal for parents and other adults to make the plans on their behalf. However, when kids get older and become teenagers, they must learn to take care of themselves.
McCarthy suggests that parents refrain from meddling in their teen’s affairs. Instead, establish certain ground rules, such as the necessity of doing homework, the requirement for seven to eight hours of sleep per night, and the value of regular exercise.
Only intervene if the rules are being persistently broken.
Focus: Some theories view goals as being crucial for a person’s subjective well-being. According to a quote attributed to Albert Einstein, “If you want to live a happy life, bind it to a goal, not to people or things.”
Studies reveal that having a goal gives us a sense of purpose and meaning even if we are unsuccessful in achieving it.
Our modern lives have caused a surge of all kinds of problems with a focus on people of all ages.
It’s crucial to talk about how the internet can interfere with daily life since screens offer quick satisfaction, which makes it difficult to put them down and concentrate on less interesting chores, said McCarthy.
She recommends having family time and meals without any screens. Encourage physical hobbies that don’t require screens like cooking, baking, constructing things, sewing, crocheting, sketching, painting, and gardening.
Talk: Discussing your feelings assures you that what you’re going through is real and significant to you.
The mere act of verbalising feelings reduced the intensity of brain activity in the amygdala, one of the primary regions of the brain involved in processing emotional reactions, according to research done using brain imaging techniques.
According to this research, discussing feelings and using coping techniques like deep breathing, removing yourself from the situation, and yelling into a pillow can all help you better manage your emotions.
Awareness: Teens can be very aware — but most of their world. Help them learn to see beyond that.
Discuss current affairs and newsworthy topics. Discuss how things affect people in particular and how different people may see them in various ways.
Take your teen on outings; even a short stroll in the park or trip to a nearby town might offer them the chance to look around and notice things they might otherwise miss.
Participate in volunteer activities as a family and teach teens how they can change the world.
Establish family check-in traditions. Give everyone a chance to share their day’s experiences.
Flexibility: Life throws curve balls all the time, and teens need to be able to adjust.
McCarthy continues by advising guardians and parents not to be overly strict about their teen’s routines. It’s crucial to assist them in setting priorities and determining which tasks can be skipped or delayed when a positive or negative event occurs.
Encourage some spontaneity. This is also about learning to set priorities and avoiding becoming too accustomed to a routine. Set a good example. Be spontaneous yourself, and don’t let scheduling issues upset you. Adjust your plans.
“Any time you let your teen do something, there is a reasonable chance that they will fail. Resist the urge to jump in right away.
“While it’s important to have your child’s back (now and for the rest of their life), sometimes teens need to fail to learn. Give them a chance to figure it out themselves before you offer help. They may just surprise you,” she said.
