Celebrated marriage counselor, Frank Edem Adofoli has observed that perfect marriages have their owns share of fights, disappointments, hurt among other unimaginable things which spices up such relationships but must not end with divorce.
Also READ: 28 reasons why so many marriages fail these days
He explains that any
perfect marriage without these is imperfect considering the fact that getting
married means going through the issues of life, good or bad; and life gets
tougher because of the presence of another person in one’s life.
“There are fights in
perfect marriages, hurt in a perfect marriage, there is disappointment,
disease, distance, debt, even death but besides all these, those perfect
marriages have not ended in divorce.
You are not in your
spouse’s life by mistake, there is a purpose. Your presence has the power to
help someone do away with some bad habit or behaviour; your presence could help
them be saved. Some spouses won’t be enjoying some blessings or favour if they
were not married to their present partners. If you understand the purpose of
your marriage, divorce won’t be an option”, he disclosed in his latest article.
Read full text of the
article below;
MARRIAGE IS NOT A PARADISE
Written by Counselor Adofoli
Falling in love feels so good that everyone who fell in love for
the first time assume that, if just a relationship can feel like this then
marriage will be a paradise; making some people dream and fantasize marriage as
a promise land, a city of everlasting happiness, a union full of smiles, a
relationship filled with heart beats.
But in reality, that is not the truth. It’s just like a child
who thinks growing up will solve all his problems; only for him to become an
adult and realize that childhood is full of dreams which never come to pass.
One important lesson I have learnt in life is, once you know the
journey you are pursuing is hard, you prepare for the hardest. That is why we
have second chance and resits. We are not born losers and we hate to lose. If
it requires doing the same thing a hundred times to achieve the result you
need, you never give up.
But when it comes to marriage the story is different. Since we
see it as a paradise, we go in to enjoy, receive, and be happy. It starts from
the wedding or marriage ceremony. No wonder people spend so much on their
weddings, thinking the size of the wedding will equal the size of happiness in
the marriage.
Honeymoon has become like an entrance exams, a do or die game
for new couples and full of ecstasy; forgetting that the hotel or city they find
themselves in isn’t their home. But realty always sets in when the couple get
settled in to live their normal lives. Surprises start popping up, expectations
are not met and because they had not prepared for the worst, its easy to leave
after a few attempts.
As far as marriage is on earth, there is nothing like paradise.
Getting married means you go through the issues of life, good or bad; and life
gets tougher because of the presence of another person in your life.
You all have two eyes but not the same view. How you see things
is different from your spouse. There are fights in perfect marriages, hurt in a
perfect marriage, there is disappointment, disease, distance, debt, even death
but besides all these, those perfect marriages have not ended in divorce.
You are not in your spouse’s life by mistake, there is a
purpose. Your presence has the power to help someone do away with some bad
habit or behaviour; your presence could help them be saved. Some spouses won’t
be enjoying some blessings or favour if they were not married to their present
partners. If you understand the purpose of your marriage, divorce won’t be an
option.
Everyone needs a helper, someone who never gives up on us no
matter the journey. No wonder God says ““It is not good for the man to be
alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” – Genesis 2:18 (NLT).
In fact the most beautiful marriage is between the most
difficult spouses. Never giving up on the other; fighting to hold on than to
leave. For strong couples don’t play the victim, they don’t make themselves
look pitiful and don’t point fingers. They rather stand and deal with issues
that confront their union.
If your heart is strong, all the difficult things you encounter in your marriage will become easy. But if your heart is weak, all the easy things in your marriage will become difficult for you.
Also READ: Pastor Lutterodt readies to marry a second wife
In conclusion, sometimes we think the beginning of a marriage is the most beautiful so couples don’t even get to the end, but sunsets are proof that endings can often be beautiful too.
Source:MyNewsGh.com
