1. Empathize and validate her emotions. This one can be hard, but as long as you let her take the lead you can help her get a hold of her feelings. Get her to open up about how she feels instead of the situation or the outcome by drawing on your personal experience. Labeling the feelings will help her control them:
“I know you really wanted that job. I would be really let down in your shoes.”
“You absolutely have a right to be sad; I would be too.”
2. Acknowledge the issue and briefly express your feelings. Just showing someone that you see and understand their problem means the world. Keep it short and simple.
“I am so sad to hear that your mom is sick.”
“I know you really deserved that promotion. I’m sorry it didn’t work out.”
“She was a great friend, and I’m upset she’s moving away too.”
3.Be supportive, not dismissive. It doesn’t matter if you don’t agree with her issues. Reassure her that you’re there for her. Take her to a private spot and tell her that it’s alright to cry. Ensure her that you’re on her side.
“I know that this must feel terrible right now. I’m so sorry.”
“I can’t imagine how you feel. I know this can’t be easy.”
“I’m sorry that you’re upset. Please let me know if I can do anything to make it better.”
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