Khloé Kardashian recently appeared on the “On Purpose” podcast, hosted by Jay Shetty, and opened up about an important conversation around comparison, jealousy, and the emotional patterns that begin forming in childhood.
While many may associate these struggles with adulthood, Kardashian shared that her seven-year-old daughter, True, has already started comparing herself to her cousins, a moment that made her pause and reflect on how early these behaviours take root.
The reality TV personality admitted that comparison is something she had to confront in her own life.
Speaking to Shetty, she said, “Comparison is the thief of joy,” explaining how it strips away satisfaction from one’s achievements when constantly measuring them against others.
And you can be inspired by others or motivated by others,” she said.
“But the jealousy or the comparison is something that we – or I have even – had to retrain my brain to not always look at someone and be like, ‘Well, why don’t I have that? Or how can I get like it?’
“It should be more from a motivational way as opposed to an envious way.”
Kardashian believes the mindset we adopt when seeing someone else’s success plays a critical role. It is up to each person to decide whether to view others as a source of envy or inspiration.
The Good American founder acknowledged that retraining her mind not to ask, “Why don’t I have that?” has been an ongoing process. Instead, she now tries to approach these thoughts with curiosity and motivation rather than jealousy.
As a mother of two, she also expressed concern about the broader culture her children are growing up in, one where wanting more has become the norm.
She said this societal pressure often leaves her feeling uneasy, particularly when it begins to affect young children.
To better understand this pattern, we spoke to Melandri Constant, global narrative researcher and social justice activist with a background in psychology.
Constant explained that comparison and jealousy often begin during early childhood.
These feelings are shaped by a mix of family dynamics, peer interactions, and societal expectations. When not addressed or guided with care, they can quietly follow children into their teenage years and adulthood.
“Human beings are pretty much wired to be competitive, and jealousy is a natural human emotion that arises relatively early in human development. It is considered natural for children to develop jealousy and a competitive nature as they begin to understand their place in the world,” she said.
Studies have demonstrated that feelings of jealousy arise as early as infancy, when babies have been seen to vocalise or become visibly upset when their mothers show affection to a doll or another sibling.
In some cases, these behaviours escalate into aggression toward the perceived rival or even the caregiver.
Later in life, jealousy can manifest as tantrums, withdrawal, or hostility in school-aged children. According to behaviour specialists, competitiveness shows up equally in girls and boys.
“Healthy competition doesn’t usually have any impact on friendships or relationships with others. It can have positive effects on motivation for some children and lead to important life skills like handling winning and losing, respecting others, and developing a growth mindset,” Constant explained.
Hypercompetitiveness, the drive to win at all costs, can lead to a breakdown in friendships, low self-esteem, and even mental health issues such as depression and anxiety.
“In today’s world, many systems we live in, from school to work to relationships, thrive on comparison and scarcity,” Constant continued.
“Capitalism teaches us to compete for limited opportunities, often without fair reward. But in doing so, we lose touch with the value of community, collaboration, and the beauty of diverse skillsets.
“When we raise children to see others only as competition, we chip away at their ability to see the strength in connection.”
So, how can adults help children manage jealousy before it becomes toxic?
“Start by empathising with children. When they feel seen and heard, they’re more likely to open up. Show them that their feelings are valid, not shameful,” Constant advised. “It’s also important to help them celebrate what makes them unique, their talents, personalities, even their quirks. This fosters self-worth.”
She added, “Encouraging gratitude can help children recognise the good in their lives. Whether it’s their relationships, experiences, or qualities, teaching thankfulness shifts focus from what they don’t have to what they do.”
Another thing parents should be mindful of is how often they draw comparisons, even casually.#
“We sometimes say things without realising how harmful they can be. Remarks like ‘Why can’t you be more like your cousin?’ may seem harmless, but they shape how a child views their own worth,” said Constant.
Finally, she encouraged adults to praise the process, not just the results. #
“Children will need time to identify and work through jealous feelings. When you notice growth, even small changes, acknowledge it. Support and encouragement are key to building resilience and healthier emotional habits.”
