Saif-Kareena vs Vijay-Rashmika: 5 Things You Should Learn to NOT Do From Their Marriages

Recently, two celebrity couples gave us very different things to talk about. Saif Ali Khan and Kareena Kapoor Khan appeared on The Great Indian Kapil Show, while Vijay Deverakonda and Rashmika Mandanna made an appearance on Koffee With Karan.

Both couples spoke about their relationships, but their dynamics were poles apart.

Saif and Kareena were playful, comfortable and genuinely funny together. When Kareena recalled how Saif proposed to her thrice, Saif joked that she could have said yes the first time and saved him some money. Vijay and Rashmika, meanwhile, gave us a few moments that deserve a second look. Rashmika spoke about asking Vijay to marry her for an entire year because he told her to ask him “a hundred times”.

Now, we don’t know what happens in either couple’s private life, and a few interview clips aren’t enough to judge an entire marriage. But the way people talk about their partners can tell us something about the relationship dynamics they’re comfortable presenting to the world. So, here are five relationship lessons men can take away from these two couples.

selena gomez and benny blanco of tollywood 🤡 https://t.co/t25hpkAzRN

Expressing your love for your partner is cute but if you have to campaign for your own relationship in this process, that’s not something to rejoice over. On Koffee With Karan, Rashmika spoke about asking Vijay to marry her for a year. Vijay’s response was that he had told her to ask him a hundred times.

Sure, some couples have their own way of navigating commitment. But if one person is constantly asking for reassurance, initiating difficult conversations or trying to move the relationship forward, while the other gets to sit back and enjoy the ride, that’s worth thinking about.

What to do instead: Men, your girlfriend shouldn’t have to run a one-woman PR campaign to convince you that your relationship is worth committing to. Make your partner feel chosen, too. She shouldn’t have to keep wondering whether she’s the only one excited about building a future together.

One of the sweetest things about being in a relationship is having someone who looks out for you. Someone who remembers the little things, checks whether you’ve eaten and knows when you need a hug instead of a lecture. But there’s a difference between being cared for and expecting to be parented.

In a promotional interview for Ranabaali with Shubhankar Mishra, Vijay has spoken about Rashmika fitting in beautifully with his family while Rashmika described how she sleeps late because she loves to tuck him in at night and put him to sleep. It’s an adorable detail on the surface. However, you can’t help but wonder if he does the same for her. Does he also make her feel loved and wanted or this ‘seva’ one-sided?

What to do instead: Learn to care for your partner in the ways she cares for you. Remember the little things. Check in on her. Take things off her plate without waiting for instructions. And, for the love of God, learn to tuck her in, too.

Saif and Kareena had a fun banter going on The Kapil Sharma Show, which was refreshingly unbothered. You could feel there was no sense of either of them wanting to win the conversation. Saif shared how he was the one who apologised after a disagreement without making it sound like he was belittling Kareena or calling her egoistic in any way.

Some men treat an apology like a defeat. They would rather spend three business days sulking than admit they were wrong about something that could have been resolved with a simple, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” You don’t get bonus husband points for refusing to back down.

What to do instead: Learn to apologise without attaching a tiny legal disclaimer. No “I’m sorry, but you started it.” No “I’m sorry you feel that way.” Being the first to apologise doesn’t mean you’re always wrong. Sometimes, it means you’re more interested in fixing things than winning.

Kareena shared a fun story about being proposed to in Mumbai, Greece and Paris before saying yes. Saif’s little jibe about saving money if Kareena had accepted his proposal in Mumbai is exactly the kind of teasing that makes a couple fun to watch. He pokes fun at the situation without making Kareena the punchline in a way that diminishes her. And that’s an important distinction.

If the joke consistently makes one person look foolish while the other gets all the laughs, maybe the problem isn’t that your partner can’t take a joke. Maybe you’re just not that funny.

What to do instead: Make your partner laugh with you, not at her. Good banter comes with affection and mutual respect. You should be able to tease each other without making one person feel small.

The biggest red flag one can spot in Vijay-Rashmika’s interviews is how expressive Rashmika is about her love for Vijay while he seems very nonchalant about it. Reciprocation is at a dangerous low and it feels like she does a lot more for him than he does for her. On the other hand, one of the nicest things about watching Saif and Kareena together is how affectionate they are even in their teasing. There’s familiarity in the way they speak and no obvious need to turn every answer into a grand declaration of love

And that’s the thing about long-term relationships: grand gestures are lovely, but everyday effort is what keeps things going. You don’t have to be overly romantic to express that. Small, everyday gestures say a lot more.

What to do instead: Say thank you. Tell her what you appreciate and love about her. Notice when she’s making an effort. Plan the date sometimes. Take the initiative. And don’t wait until she’s upset to start acting like you remember you’re in a relationship.

You don’t need to recreate Saif’s multiple-proposal tour of Mumbai, Greece and Paris. A little consistency will do just fine.

Saif and Kareena feel like the kind of love we all want in our lives while Vijay-Rashmika feel like the kind of relationship we want to run miles away from. However, neither couple needs us to grade their marriage based on a television appearance. We see snippets, not the whole story. But we can still take a few useful lessons from the way they talk about love.

Be the man who makes an effort without being asked. Who can apologise without losing his ego. Who knows the difference between teasing his partner and disrespecting her. Who understands that being loved is not the same as being looked after.

Romance isn’t just about finding someone who’ll say yes to you. It’s about giving them enough reasons to keep saying yes.