A husband moves out of the bedroom because his wife’s screen time is affecting his sleep.
Today on ‘Am I the Skebenga?’, a husband leaves the bedroom because of his wife’s social media use at bedtime.
What might have started as a simple pastime now poses a threat to couples. While social media was created for people to stay connected in the online world, the irony lies in the ideology that when people ‘overuse’ it, they risk losing their connections in the real world.
A Pinetown man, who chose to remain anonymous, wrote to Carol Ofori with the hopes of finding out if he was wrong about a situation with his wife.
He wrote, “At least three times a week, my wife lies in bed next to me while I’m trying to fall asleep, and scrolls social media on her phone. The light is really bright, and what’s worse is that she giggles and laughs all the time. Sometimes she even voice notes her friends! In bed while I’m trying to sleep! When I complain, she tells me she can’t sleep, but this actually helps her sleep. So, now I’ve started sleeping in the spare room, and it’s caused a bit of a rift. She says I’m overreacting and just looking for an excuse to sleep in another bed.
Am I being a skebenga for moving out of the room?”
Interestingly, in 2024, it was revealed that South Africans had the worst screen time usage.
While the global average was six hours and 37 minutes, South Africans spent more than half of their days (60%) using their digital devices.
There have been several research studies that revealed that using your phone before bedtime actually disrupts your sleep patterns and is linked to insomnia.
The Frontiers website revealed that: “Screen use is thought to impact sleep in four ways:
- Notifications disturb sleep
- Screen time replaces sleeping time
- Screen activities keep you awake, so you take longer to fall asleep
- Light exposure delays circadian rhythm
Without all the research studies, it stands to reason that introducing digital devices into the bedroom is a leading cause of ‘disconnect’ in relationships.
Before the smartphone, there was the humble television. So, the battle with digital devices in the bedroom is not a new concept. ScienceDirect states that choosing not to use a smartphone in the bedroom can lead to increased happiness and quality of life.
What’s more is that while many people say using their smartphones helps them fall asleep, like Anonymous’s wife, sleeping without smartphones is linked to better sleep, improved focus, and wellbeing, and, get this, better relationships.