File photo of a worried man
Dear GhanaWeb,
I have been married for two years, and though we haven’t had children yet, I hoped we were building something meaningful.
My wife recently returned home after spending nearly two weeks in the hospital. It was there that I learned of a condition called rectovaginal fistula, a medical complication where a tear between the rectum and vagina causes stool to pass through the vaginal canal.
Sadly, my wife was diagnosed with this and underwent surgery.
Naturally, everyone might wonder how this happened. I want to be clear: it did not occur within our marriage.
The truth was difficult to hear, my wife had been engaging in anal sex with another man, possibly over a long period.
Though I wasn’t informed directly by the doctors, I became aware of her admission during her hospital stay.
When I found out, I was devastated. I stopped visiting her at the hospital during her final days there.
What hurt even more was realizing that she had once brought up trying anal sex with me, something I dismissed, not knowing she was already doing it with someone else.
She had begun exhibiting symptoms long before seeking medical help. I would often notice a foul smell when she was around, but when I questioned it, she always brushed it off.
She wore protective garments and tried to hide the worsening condition until it became unbearable.
Eventually, she admitted she was unwell and went to the hospital. But even then, she concealed the full truth from me, pretending not to understand what was happening, while she did.
As painful as this is to say, I have made the decision to end the marriage. I cannot move past this betrayal.
I won’t force her to leave our home, we built it together, but I may choose to move out myself.
Her parents are expected to visit this weekend, and I intend to wait until then before making any final arrangements.
This entire experience has shattered my trust. It’s a heartbreaking lesson that appearances can be deceiving. My wife seemed like the most honest and devoted partner, and yet, here we are.
I’m still in shock and don’t know how to even begin discussing this with anyone. I’ve invested so much, emotionally and financially, into this relationship. We have no children, so I wonder: would I be wrong to walk away?
Will I be judged harshly for leaving? What should I do now?
FG/EB
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