I\u2019m a bit biased about the positive effects of seeing a therapist, but I often have a new client come to me and say, \u201cI was so scared to come here today,\u201d or, \u201cWell, that wasn\u2019t really so bad. I tho"},"modified":"2019-07-09T14:16:47","modified_gmt":"2019-07-09T14:16:47","slug":"7-ways-seeing-a-therapist-works-better-than-talking-to-a-friend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ghanamma.com\/2019\/07\/09\/7-ways-seeing-a-therapist-works-better-than-talking-to-a-friend\/","title":{"rendered":"7 ways seeing a therapist works better than talking to a friend"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
Ditch the notion that therapy sucks.<\/p>\n
I\u2019m a bit biased about the positive effects of seeing a therapist, but I often have a new client come to me and say, \u201cI was so scared to come here today,\u201d or, \u201cWell, that wasn\u2019t really so bad. I thought it was going to suck!\u201d The truth is, seeing a therapist doesn\u2019t have to suck, and if going to therapy does suck for you, find a new therapist.<\/p>\n
There are so many people to choose from, so continue looking until you find someone who resonates with you, someone you respect and would want to have as a friend. Being very clear though, this person can never be considered a friend in any social settings, outside of the therapy office.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s a boundary violation and an ethical issue, but if you like him or her, as you would a friend, you\u2019ll be more willing to talk and trust, to open up as a whole. Find someone you like and respect, and then start talking!<\/p>\n
And why should you turn to therapy instead of your friends? Here are 7 reasons why, despite misconceptions, seeing a therapist is actually wonderful for you and your mental health.<\/p>\n
1. You get one full hour (sometimes two, if you ask nicely) to talk about yourself<\/strong>
Not to mention, you get to do so without worrying about judgment or having to see your therapist in the drop-off line at your kid\u2019s school after a session. The best part, though? You don\u2019t have to worry if you\u2019re giving your therapist enough time to discuss herself, because she won\u2019t talk about herself.<\/p>\nYou don\u2019t have to worry if you sound crazy, selfish or even if you go into a full-blown \u201cugly cry.\u201d Go for it! This is your time. Therapists always have plenty of tissue on hand to mop up your tears. It\u2019s exactly the place to feel and experience all of your emotions.<\/p>\n
You can get mad, storm out, and the therapist will still be there the next week, wanting to talk about your experience. Where else can you get that kind of dedication and attention?<\/p>\n
2. You can go to your dark places and remain safe<\/strong>
A good therapist won\u2019t react to your \u201cdark places\u201d or \u201chard things\u201d with discomfort. And, unlike a friend might, they wouldn\u2019t dare say, \u201cUm, you\u2019re just too dark for this \u2018friendship\u2019 to work.\u201d<\/p>\nTherapists provide a container for you to bounce around in. In a good therapeutic relationship, the therapist allows you to go to the edge of your fear or darkness and, at times, sanity, without actually going over.<\/p>\n
The therapist helps guide you and allows you to become more enlightened along your path to self-discovery and\/or recovery. The therapist will not let you crash, but walk with you right up to the crash scene and emotionally hold your hand; they will facilitate your arrival on the other end, through the dark places.<\/p>\n
3. You get someone who actually keeps your secrets<\/strong>
In fact, the law requires therapists to hold secrets and not divulge them to anyone. Unless you\u2019re going to hurt yourself or someone else \u2014 then, okay, they legally have to tell.<\/p>\nBut that\u2019s a good thing, right? Otherwise, secretly jealous of your best friend? Secretly resentful of your brother? Secretly worried whether you should or shouldn\u2019t marry your partner? Your therapist keeps those secrets and, even better, provides space for you to explore what\u2019s really going on behind those feelings you feel uncomfortable admitting or sharing elsewhere.<\/p>\n
4. Therapy can be fun\u2026 at times<\/strong>
A good therapist is able to help you laugh at some of your issues, in a loving and productive way. We all take ourselves and our lives so seriously, but sometimes, it\u2019s truly helpful to have someone in your life who helps you find the levity in an otherwise ridiculous or challenging situation.<\/p>\n5. Therapy provides unbiased insights into your behavior<\/strong>
Most everybody else in the world gives you their opinion about your life, your choices, or your challenges, based on their own experiences. However, a therapist\u2019s experience doesn\u2019t really matter, because he or she is not your BFF.<\/p>\nA therapist shows you the pros and cons of a situation, helping you make the best decision for yourself.<\/p>\n
6. Therapy provides structure and a touch point<\/strong>
That regular, weekly appointment becomes a place of refuge and relief when everything else in your world seems like it\u2019s coming unhinged. Hopefully, your therapist\u2019s office is the one place where things make sense and you feel safe.<\/p>\n7. A good therapist plays many roles for you along the way<\/strong>
Sometimes you might need a good swift kick in the pants, other times you need a steadfast cheerleader, other times you\u2019ll require (if nothing else) a good, strong, silent shoulder to cry on. Your therapist, if you see them for a period of time \u2014 truly allowing yourself to trust and be vulnerable \u2014 becomes all of those things to you as your unique journey of self-exploration warrants.<\/p>\nSo go to therapy! With so many different kinds of therapeutic interventions, techniques, theories, and practices, \u201cgoing to therapy\u201d seems stressful and confusing. But actually, much of that stuff doesn\u2019t really matter.<\/p>\n
In fact, studies on the outcomes of a positive therapeutic relationship found that the true test of success in therapy is if you have a positive, trusting and friendly therapeutic relationship with your therapist. Find a fun therapist you trust. Then, therapy becomes awesome to support and enhance your life.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Ditch the notion that therapy sucks. I\u2019m a bit biased about the positive effects of seeing a therapist, but I often have a new client come to me and say, \u201cI was so scared to come here today,\u201d or, \u201cWell, that wasn\u2019t really so bad. I thought it was going to suck!\u201d The truth is, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":653069,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-653068","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-lifestyle"],"yoast_head":"\n
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