{"id":610711,"date":"2019-04-27T10:00:48","date_gmt":"2019-04-27T10:00:48","guid":{"rendered":"<br><div>\n<figure class=\"fff post-thumbnail\" itemprop=\"associatedMedia\" itemscope=\"\" itemtype=\"http:\/\/schema.org\/ImageObject\"><img class=\"post_layout_5_img\" src=\"https:\/\/cdn.ghana-mma.com\/2019\/04\/Couple-8.jpg\" alt=\"5 Ways to deal with jealousy so you can "},"modified":"2019-04-27T10:00:48","modified_gmt":"2019-04-27T10:00:48","slug":"5-ways-to-deal-with-jealousy-so-you-can-stop-being-insecure","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ghanamma.com\/2019\/04\/27\/5-ways-to-deal-with-jealousy-so-you-can-stop-being-insecure\/","title":{"rendered":"5 Ways to deal with jealousy so you can stop being insecure"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><\/p>\n<div>\n<figure class=\"fff post-thumbnail\" itemprop=\"associatedMedia\" itemscope=\"\" itemtype=\"http:\/\/schema.org\/ImageObject\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"post_layout_5_img\" src=\"https:\/\/cdn.ghanamma.com\/2019\/04\/Couple-8.jpg\" alt=\"5 Ways to deal with jealousy so you can stop being insecure\"\/><\/figure>\n<div class=\"mom-ads-wrap  \">\n<div class=\"mom-ads ads-layout-rotator ads-rotator-id-36\" style=\"width:728px; height:90px;\">\n<div class=\"mom-ads-inner\">\n<div class=\"mom-ad\" data-id=\"1236\" style=\"width:728px; height:90px; \">\n<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"appear\" src=\"https:\/\/cdn.ghanamma.com\/2019\/04\/Say-yes-to-ads-Banner-728-X-90.jpg\" alt=\"Right Below Featured Image\" width=\"728\" height=\"90\"\/>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Learning how to deal with jealously and feeling insecure and envious of others is tough.<\/p>\n<p>You want it. Someone else has it. So, you can\u2019t have it. Which only makes you want it more.<\/p>\n<p>You need to learn how to deal with jealousy and insecurity before you make a bad choice and try to get it.<\/p>\n<p>The feeling is familiar to all of us. At the very least we can remember the creeping green of jealousy\u00a0when we were kids: \u201cWhy did\u00a0<em>she<\/em>\u00a0get the Malibu Barbie Playhouse for Christmas and\u00a0<em>I\u00a0<\/em>got books?<\/p>\n<p>Why does\u00a0<em>he<\/em>\u00a0get a car for his sixteenth birthday, and\u00a0<em>I<\/em>\u00a0still have to ride the school bus?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dr. Robert L. Leahy, Ph.D.\u00a0describes jealousy as \u201cangry, agitated worry.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The insecurities\u00a0underlying it stems from a yearning for certainty, worry about not having it, and anger at the threat you perceive.<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/_HpSLyR7Jpo\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>You want to know that you are as valuable as the person who has what you want.<\/p>\n<p>You want to know that your partner won\u2019t leave you for someone else.<\/p>\n<p>Perhaps, you even hope another person\u2019s partner will leave them for\u00a0<em>you.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>At the root of this insecure emotion and\u00a0the motive for so many dark headlines is the \u201cgrass-is-greener\u201d\u00a0effect.<\/p>\n<p>This can show up as romanticizing about someone who is unavailable. (Surely, you and Ryan Reynolds are an ideal match, and you\u2019re ready for your one-way flight to Hollywood.)<\/p>\n<p>It can also show up as fantasizing about a thing or a lifestyle that isn\u2019t available to you.<\/p>\n<p>Jealousy can be a coping strategy that you employ to keep from getting hurt.<\/p>\n<p>When insecurity starts to swell, jealousy can be a way of preempting a\u00a0<em>perceived\u00a0<\/em>threat:\u00a0<em>\u201cIf I make \u2018this\u2019 assumption, I won\u2019t be as shocked and hurt when it becomes reality.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>But what are you supposed to do once you recognize the feeling?<\/p>\n<p>To know how to stop being insecure and\u00a0deal with your\u00a0jealousy when you want something or someone you can\u2019t have, you need to start recognizing those emotions.<\/p>\n<p>The most important thing to remember about jealousy is that having jealous feelings don\u2019t equal jealous behaviors.<\/p>\n<p>The choice to act on those feelings is just that \u2014 a choice.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Here are 5 ways for\u00a0dealing with jealousy and insecurity when you want something you can\u2019t have.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>1. Accept and observe your envious thoughts and feelings<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>You may feel your anger and anxiety heighten as you spend time observing your jealousy.<\/p>\n<p>But that mindful presence can help the feeling of jealousy weaken.<\/p>\n<p><strong>2. Accept that your jealous feelings are normal<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>In the case of feeling attracted to a person who is unavailable (or if\u00a0<em>you<\/em>\u00a0are unavailable), acknowledge that your eye has wandered.<\/p>\n<p>Accept that you felt an attraction. The presence of a relationship doesn\u2019t nullify the ability to feel attraction to someone you can\u2019t have.<\/p>\n<p><strong>3. Acknowledge the connection between unavailability and attractiveness<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Learning how to deal with jealousy and insecurity requires some fearless introspection.<\/p>\n<p>Ask yourself why you are so attracted to what is unavailable.<\/p>\n<p>Is it possible that\u00a0<em>you\u00a0<\/em>are emotionally unavailable and afraid of commitment?<\/p>\n<p>Is it possible that you don\u2019t feel you have what it takes to have the things you covet in others\u2019 lives?<\/p>\n<p><strong>4. Learn to compartmentalize<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Jealousy and insecurity can take you on a long Thelma-and-Louise\u00a0road trip if you let them.<\/p>\n<p>You wonder\u2026and wander\u2026and before you know it, you\u2019ve lost the ability to discern between fantasy and reality.<\/p>\n<p>Compartmentalizing is about reeling in your wandering thoughts. Don\u2019t let yourself go deeper into your fantasies.<\/p>\n<p>Daydreaming about life without financial worries the night before the $1B Powerball draw is one thing.<\/p>\n<p>But, spending your savings on tickets and quitting your job is another.<\/p>\n<p><strong>5. Practice gratitude for what you have<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Jealousy and insecurity are handy labels for saying,<em>\u00a0\u201cI\u2019m not enough\u201d<\/em>\u00a0and\u00a0<em>\u201cI don\u2019t have enough.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>There is\u00a0<em>always<\/em>\u00a0going to be someone with more than you and far, far more people with less than you.<\/p>\n<p>If your mind has space in any given moment for one thought only, why not choose to fill it with affirming gratitude for what you\u00a0<em>do<\/em>\u00a0have?<\/p>\n<p>Feeling jealous is part of the human journey.\u00a0<em>Acting\u00a0<\/em>on jealousy is what ends up writing the tragic stories of human history.<\/p>\n<p>Thoughts and feelings are only precursors to behavior.<\/p>\n<p>You may be surprised by some of the thoughts and feelings that show up at unexpected, unwelcomed times.<\/p>\n<p>But, in the same way you can choose your behaviors, you can also choose the thoughts that direct them.<\/p>\n<p><span class=\"ctx-article-root\"\/>  <\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a style=\"display:none\" rel=\"follow\" href=\"http:\/\/megatheme.ir\/\" title=\"\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0628 \u0648\u0631\u062f\u067e\u0631\u0633\">\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0628 \u0648\u0631\u062f\u067e\u0631\u0633<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Learning how to deal with jealously and feeling insecure and envious of others is tough. You want it. Someone else has it. So, you can\u2019t have it. Which only makes you want it more. You need to learn how to deal with jealousy and insecurity before you make a bad choice and try to get [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":610712,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-610711","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-lifestyle"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>5 Ways to deal with jealousy so you can stop being insecure - Ghanamma.com<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.ghanamma.com\/2019\/04\/27\/5-ways-to-deal-with-jealousy-so-you-can-stop-being-insecure\/\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"5 Ways to deal with jealousy so you can stop being insecure - Ghanamma.com\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:description\" content=\"Learning how to deal with jealously and feeling insecure and envious of others is tough. 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