Discovering a partner\u2019s infidelity is easier than ever before in history. Via text messages, emails and online credit card statements, a careless cheating spouse is likely to leave an electronic trail detailing their affair that\u2019s over a gigabyte long.<\/p>\n
If you can get your hands on such physical signs and evidence that your husband or wife is cheating, that type of digital proof is the best way to bust a cheater for sure.<\/p>\n
Unfortunately, it\u2019s not always so simple.<\/p>\n
While most people know the typical telltale signs of cheating \u2014 weight loss, new music or food interests, and large, uncharacteristic purchases of things like a new wardrobe \u2014 if you want to know how to tell if your wife (or husband, boyfriend or girlfriend, of course) is cheating, there are more subtle signs you should be aware of and look for.<\/p>\n
If your infidelity radar is on high-alert and your partner\u2019s behavior feels off, here are 13 not-so-obvious signs he or she is cheating that many men and women overlook.<\/p>\n
1. Time stamping<\/strong><\/p>\n
Optimizing precious moments with a lover is a balancing act, so he\u2019s counting minutes.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt won\u2019t raise any red flags if I\u2019m home by 6:00 pm on the dot,\u201d he rationalizes. Or, \u201cIf I call her every day at noon, she won\u2019t get suspicious.\u201d<\/p>\n
He\u2019s drawing timelines in the sand, and being uncharacteristically prompt or oddly ritualized with his schedule may be one way he does that.<\/p>\n
2. New lingo<\/strong><\/p>\n
A friend of mine\u2019s suspicions grew when he heard his wife irritably yell, \u201cGood Christ!\u201d \u2014 an expression neither one of them had ever used, and one she typically would have found offensive.<\/p>\n
If your husband or wife is spending enough time with their lover, they\u2019re sure to pick up some of their verbal expressions.<\/p>\n
3. Changing things up<\/strong><\/p>\n
Every evening \u2014 like clockwork \u2014 he comes home, asks about dinner and walks the dog. But suddenly, that ritual is being messed with.<\/p>\n
He needs a shower as soon as he walks in the door. Or he pours himself two fingers of scotch when that\u2019s usually reserved for weekends only.<\/p>\n
Something is quite possibly going on.<\/p>\n
4. Driving alone<\/strong><\/p>\n
Typically, you\u2019d hop in the car together and be on your way. But recently, she finds a myriad of reasons to have a few minutes alone \u2014 and a need to take her own car to an event you\u2019ll both be attending.<\/p>\n
\u201cI have to stop at Sephora, and I don\u2019t want to bore you!\u201d she says, time and again.<\/p>\n
Mhmm.<\/p>\n
5. Wearing a lampshade<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u201cLet\u2019s go out and get wasted tonight,\u201d he atypically and enthusiastically suggests, and you know he hasn\u2019t said anything like that since he was pledging a fraternity.<\/p>\n
Having an affair, it\u2019s no secret, can make people feel young and impulsive again, and that can spill over into other behaviors.<\/p>\n
6. Wanting you to strut your stuff<\/strong><\/p>\n
What\u2019s this? A little something from Vicky\u2019s Secret just for you? Funny, he\u2019s always claimed that lingerie doesn\u2019t do much for him.<\/p>\n
His affair has reawakened his libido and, ironically, he\u2019d like it to do the same for you.<\/p>\n
7. You\u2019re clearly up to no good<\/strong><\/p>\n
You smile at the waiter and he goes off. He knows you\u2019re a friendly sort \u2014 he always loved that about you \u2014 but recently, that innocent cordiality seems to antagonize him in ways it never did.<\/p>\n
Now that he\u2019s having an affair, he knows it\u2019s not so far-fetched that you might, too.<\/p>\n
8. No harm in looking, right?<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u201cDid you see our cute neighbor checking out your butt?\u201d she asks with a big smile.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat flight attendant is really your type!\u201d she teases, leaving you wondering what happened to her jealous streak.<\/p>\n
No mystery. She\u2019s on an affair-fueled, guilt-mitigating mission to casually justify her own extramarital attraction.<\/p>\n
9. Affairs? No biggie<\/strong><\/p>\n
You sadly report the news that your best friend\u2019s husband is cheating. Instead of sharing your dismay, he becomes defensive.<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, he hasn\u2019t been happy in that marriage,\u201d or \u201cPeople have affairs. That\u2019s life.\u201d<\/p>\n
Condemning others would mean condemning himself, and he\u2019s not about to go there.<\/p>\n
10. Won\u2019t watch it<\/strong><\/p>\n
Plot lines that would have formerly piqued her interest now make her visibly uncomfortable.<\/p>\n
If there\u2019s an affair involved, you won\u2019t be watching it together.<\/p>\n
11. All nerves<\/strong><\/p>\n
Many folks experience atypical bouts of depression and anxiety as the guilt of the affair and the stress of keeping such a huge secret take a visible toll.<\/p>\n
Symptoms may include insomnia, disinterest in eating or an unshakeable blue mood.<\/p>\n
12. Suddenly an expert<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u201cDid you know the U.S. has the highest dog population in the world?\u201d<\/p>\n
She starts spewing facts about things she\u2019s never shown interest in before. Heck, she never even liked dogs that much.<\/p>\n
Could be she\u2019s absorbing her lover\u2019s interests and finding a way to talk about them without saying as much.<\/p>\n
13. Signature blank stare<\/strong><\/p>\n
The guy who always had an answer now seems lost for words. His brain is fried with the details of the lies he\u2019s told and excuses he\u2019s made.<\/p>\n
When you innocently inquire about his last trip to Home Depot, you can almost see the wheels turning in his head.<\/em><\/p>\n
\u201c<\/i>Did I tell her I went to Home Depot? What did I tell her I was shopping for? Is she trying to trap me in a lie?\u201d<\/p>\n
While he entertains these possibilities, you\u2019re on the receiving end of that strange, faraway look in his eyes you\u2019ve been seeing all too often.<\/p>\n
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