As a man and as a husband it’s your duty to protect your wife’s heart, not to break it. Don’t hurt your wife in these silent ways:
1. You check out other women
Your wife wants to be your queen. She wants you look at her and think “I married the most beautiful woman in the world”. What do you communicate when you check out other women? You basically say that you desire other women more than you desire her. Your wife wants to be desired, loved and appreciated. She wants to be your number one. Think about how much you hurt her before you allow your eyes to wander.
2. You only talk about yourself
Imagine you come home from work and you immediately start to tell your wife about your boss, your coworkers and your plans for the weekend. She listens because she’s interested in your life. She wants to know how you feel and what you experienced.
Now it’s your turn to listen to her. But the moment she opens her mouth, you walk away from her to switch on the TV. How does she feel? Just think about how you would feel if she did the same to you.
3. You don’t do the small things you used to do
Do you remember the time when you and your wife met? Do you remember your first date? I’m sure that you acted like a real gentleman. You opened the door for her. You looked deep into her eyes. You gave her a gentle kiss on the head. Now that you’re married, you don’t do any of these things. You are too busy. You don’t have time. And when you are really honest to yourself, you don’t care about these things anymore, now that you won her heart. But just because she’s yours now doesn’t mean she won’t leave if you break her heart. Make time to be that caring, loving and thoughtful gentlemen your wife first fell in love with.
4. You spend more time with your friends than with her
I encourage you to spend time with your friends. Having good friends that you can rely on is extremely important. However, you are not married to your friends. You are married to your wife and you should give her the feeling that she’s the most important person in your life – because she should be. Nobody wants to feel like the second choice, especially not the woman who loves you more than anyone else.
5. You rather look at your smartphone than at her
You are getting older and your wife is getting older too. You might not know it, but one of your wife’s biggest fear is losing her beauty. A woman’s perception of her own beauty is directly correlated with her self-esteem. I’m sure you want a confident wife who feels beautiful. Good. Then show her how beautiful she is. You don’t have to say a word. Just look at her with a cheeky smile and give her a kiss. Stop staring at your smartphone and appreciate your wife. She deserves it.
6. You don’t desire her anymore
Desire and passion are important aspects of every marriage. Once the flame is out, it’s hard to save your marriage. Giving your wife the feeling that she’s not beautiful will break her heart. Giving her the feeling that you don’t desire her will rip it into pieces.
Act before the flame goes out.
7. You don’t see that she’s suffering
Let’s imagine for a second that you only talk about yourself, spend more time with your friends than with her, and you haven’t had an intimate moment in weeks. She’s worried that you are not attracted to her anymore. She’s scared that you don’t care anymore. That’s bad, but you could still rescue the situation. Being aware of her suffering and reacting appropriately is your last chance to save this sinking ship.
The best thing you can do is to tell her that you are sorry, talk to her about everything and promise to better yourself.
The worst thing you can do is to ignore that she’s suffering and to move on as if nothing is wrong. If you do that, she’ll move on too…but without you.