Healthy relationships are based on mutual respect, trust, support, and good communication, as explained in an article by the Hall Health Center at the University of Washington. However, healthy relationships take a lot of work, and the one thing you need to make it stronger is by developing effective and healthy communication.
Researchers believe communication is a greater predictor of divorce, more than personality compatibility, commitment levels, and life events, according to American Psychology Association (APA).
In case you were wondering, here are 7 things that couples in healthy relationships say to each other everyday:
1. “You have my support”
Maybe you’re not aware, but it’s important to let your partner know that you support them. Showing support with both verbal and non-verbal cues makes your partner feel safe to be themselves in the relationship, which helps build trust and intimacy, confirmed in a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
The study found that relationship quality improved when partners showed compassionate support for each other’s personalities and values.
2. “I love you”
Saying “I love you” for the first time is a hard stepping stone in every relationship. However, once you’ve passed it, you end up with the habit of making “I love you” seem like a chore or even something to be understood rather than spoken out loud.
According to a YouGov survey, more than half of the couples in relationships lasting from one to five years said “I love you” on a daily basis. The numbers seemed to drop significantly with each growing year of the relationship. While this is natural, saying “I love you” could and should make a difference in the quality of your relationship.
3. “I’m sorry”
We all make mistakes, but not everyone is able to admit this. Acknowledging when you are wrong and taking responsibility for your actions is a sure sign of maturity. By saying “I’m sorry” when needed, you are not only acting maturely, you are also building trust in your relationship as found in one study.
A study published in the Journal of Applied Psychology found that apologizing helped build trust when trust was violated in interpersonal relationship in comparison when the violation of trust was followed by denial.
4. “Tell me how you feel”
According to the APA, busy couples often engage in trivial conversations regarding their daily routines and obligations. Avoid daily surface-level communication, and try encouraging each other to share your innermost feelings. If one of you is hurt by the other’s action, encourage them to share their point of view and listen to their side of the story.
However, make sure to truly listen to your partner. Psychology researcher John M. Groholstates that most people lack this essential feature of effective communication. Most people find it hard to set their point of view aside and just listen to the other’s concern which makes effective communication almost impossible.
5. “Let’s settle this later”
Arguments and disagreements are a normal part of every relationship. However, how we manage these disagreements determines the outcomes of our relationships. Frequent and unresolved conflict puts too much strain on your physical and mental resources which can undermine your health and well-being.
This is why it is so important to find equilibrium each time you have an argument. If you notice your voices raising, past issues being brought up, and bickering, it might be time to take a deep breath and say that you’ll discuss the issue once your adrenaline levels get back to normal, as suggested by the Counseling and Wellness Center (CWC).
6. “Good night”
Saying good night every night even if you had a bad day is a good indicator that your relationship matters to you, says Mark Goulston, an experienced clinical psychiatrist and professor at University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA). He explains that saying good night every night means that what the two of you have is more important than any upsetting thing that might have happened that day.
7. “Have a good day”
Goulstone also emphasizes the importance of giving each other a daily dose of encouragement by saying have a good day with each new morning. The outside world can be harsh, and knowing that your partner is supportive of you while you are out and about will give the both of you the strength and energy as you go through life’s common battles.
In conclusion, healthy relationships increase our sense of well-being.
Unhealthy ones, on the other hand, can make our lives miserable. How we communicate with our significant other gives insight into the state of our relationship, but changing our communication style can also help us improve the quality of our relationships.
Say these seven things to each other daily and you’ll definitely develop a deeper bond,enduring friendship and increased intimacy.
Source: Your Tango