Here are some top six qualities in an ideal partner:
When you are sick, or under huge pressure at work, you need someone who will take over your responsibilities for a while – whether it’s preparing meals, doing household chores, taking care of kids’ homework, or tucking you into bed with some vitamin C and a hot-water bottle.
I like my partner to ‘faff’ over me when I am unwell. I need a partner who will bring me tea in bed, ensure that I take my meds, and allow me to ‘take things slow’ until I recover.
I do the same for him when he needs me.
2. Kind-hearted, compassionate
If you love animals, or you volunteer for a charity, then you will need to find someone who shares this compassion for others (humans and animal!). This is something that you need to clarify at the very beginning of your relationship.
Being an animal lover, I always notice how people speak about their pets, and how they treat their animals. This shows me how much kindness they have in them.
Does your partner have your back?
I tell my clients to imagine going to war and turning around to see if the rest of the ‘army’ is behind you for back-up. You should be confident that your partner will be there no matter what. Through ‘war’ and peace, they will have your back.
This is someone with integrity who knows right from wrong. It’s all about their value system. Couples often have different value systems, but trustworthiness can be a deal-breaker.
When you’re getting to know your partner, find out what they think is important in a relationship… also find out how their previous relationships ended. This will give you good insight into how much they value trust in a relationship.
A considerate partner is one who values your opinion and will support you even if they don’t always agree with you. Someone who will do the things that they know are important to you, even if they don’t necessarily understand them.
For example, they might personally think that flowers are a waste of money, but they understand that buying flowers for you makes you feel loved, and so they do it in order to please you.
Someone who knows you well enough not to hold grudges against you for the things you say when you’re in a bad mood! Or when you forget to do something, or you hurt them in some way. This is the kind of person who understands that we all make mistakes and none of us are perfect. And they love you even more because of your flaws.