Get ready, gentlemen. I’m about to reveal something to you that’s going to blow your mind forever.
Here it is—Not every woman strives to get married and have 2.5 kids, a white picket fence, a cat, and a dog.
There, I said it! Let that sink in for a few moments.
I realize many of you rely on using this whole “all women want is for me to ‘put a ring on it’ so they can take my money” thing as a safe, go-to excuse for NOT having a relationship.
But guess what, guys? Not every woman is even looking for a relationship … let alone marriage and kids.
Yes, there are still plenty of women for whom marriage and family is the pinnacle to their utopian romance fairy tale. Many of those women are professionals with a good education and promising careers, but to them family comes first and every potential romantic encounter is a chance at meeting a potential husband.
These women are easy to spot because if they don’t announce their intention in the opening sentences of their dating profiles, they are sure to clue you in on their plans within a half hour of your first date. No brainer.
Then, there are the other women. I usually divide them into three categories:
1. The Adventure Girl. This is the girl who wants to tick off every box and bracket before she dies. She wants to explore every remote region of the world and try every adrenaline-packed activity.
This girl is not looking for a husband, but a partner in crime and a traveling companion. So if you want to explore the remote kingdom of Mustang or try base-jumping off Angel Falls, she’s your girl. This girl is addictive. She is full of life and passion and is usually a bit crazy, which makes her irresistible in bed.
This woman sees long-term relationships as a burden. What if you don’t want to join her on that fun-filled trip to Syria? She can’t have anything or anyone holding her back. If Syria isn’t on your itinerary, she will quickly move onto another card-carrying death-wisher who will be only too happy to accompany her.
2. The Career Girl. There is only room for one love in this woman’s life—work. Or better yet, the drive to achieve the very top of her career potential and, if already there, to advance it.
This woman loves the idea of a romance. It gives her a feeling of having it all—success at work and love. However, that “love” will quickly show itself to play second fiddle should you ever ask her to move or even buy a dog together. She may buy the dog, but guess who will be walking or training him? She will, however, be happy to pet him when she gets home.
And as far as moving, you better say your goodbyes now. She worked too hard and too long to walk away from her job. While you’re there, also say goodbye to family dinners or any other couple activities you had in mind. She will schedule a few dates during the course of the month just to bring you up to speed on what she’s been up to, but don’t expect to see her much otherwise. Work comes first.
3. The Been-There-Done-That-Girl. This is a woman who got burned one time too many. Just like The Career or The Adventure Girls, the Been-There-Done-That Girl welcomes romance. But where The Career Girl’s romance might linger, The Been-There-Done-That-Girl will not allow herself to get close to you. She does not have time to run around bars meeting men and thinks it is better to have a “sure thing” in a steady s*x partner.
She is protecting herself from yet another heartache and letdown. The minute she feels your romance could turn into something lengthy, she’s out of there. Even mentioning a relationship will send her running. She has done a hell of a job building a wall around her feelings and there is no way she will let anyone penetrate it.
Of course, this list does not include married women who have their own reasons for not getting into a relationship. But that’s a whole other story.
So where does this leave you?
First and foremost, you need to figure out what you want out of life. If a mere mention of a relationship or marriage causes you to have a panic attack, you may just be very happy with one of these girls, as long as you’re willing to play by their rules.
If you’re looking for a life-partner, it is best to find someone who shares your vision from the get-go. Remember, people don’t compromise their life dreams and ambitions just because you want them to. You can’t simply tweak a “nearly perfect for me” person into your personally customized ideal. They’re either it, or they’re not.
So, how do you know what the girl you just met is looking for? Simple. All you have to do is ask.