Okay so I recently wrote a piece for the ladies letting them know that there were 6 BIG Things Men Want Them To Know About. Well one of the reasons I do what I do is because I want men and women to attempt to understand each other more, so that we can have more harmonious relationships. With that said I figured it was only right that I let the men know a few things that the ladies would love for them to know about them. Here goes nothing….
1) JUST LISTEN
Fellas I struggle with this one just as much as you do, but trust me when I tell you that sometimes she just needs you to shut up and listen. I know you think that you have all of the answers to all of her problems but sometimes she doesn’t want your mouth. She just wants your ears. Sometimes she doesn’t want to have to talk about everything to her friends and sometimes she just wants to know that you care enough to listen.
2) CLEAN UP BEHIND YOURSELF!
Yup, if you step out of your clothes, then put them in the hamper. If you’re finished with the cup or the plate, then put it in the sink. If you open up the cabinet then close the cabinet. Your woman doesn’t want to have to feel like she is your mom and it’s hard for her to feel s*xual towards someone that consistently behaves like her child.
3) IF SHE DOESN’T FEEL SEXY SHE WONT BE SEXY!
As men, we know it doesn’t take nearly as much effort to turn us on sexually, but sometimes we forget that many times women need to feel sexy in order to be sexy. This means we have to start stimulating their minds more, making them feel loved and desired, and taking our time with them and their bodies. Look, I’m a realist so I know it doesn’t happen in a text book way with flowers, candles, and hours of foreplay all of the time. Just be conscious that you aren’t going months without doing at least some of these things.
4) THEY GET BORED EASILY
As men we get really set into our habits, routines, and structures and sometimes we have a tendency to allow that to become true in our relationships as well. If we aren’t conscious, we can become VERY predictable and to her that can become VERY boring. It’s okay if you want your life to have a certain flow or structure, but when it comes to your relationship, be conscious enough to change up the routine sometimes and do something spontaneous. I often tell my male clients, that it’s perfectly okay for you to PLAN spontaneity. She doesn’t have to know that you have it written in your calendar, as far she’s concerned you are just Mr. Spur of the Moment!
5) They Don’t Just Want Time, They Want UNINTERRUPTED Time!
I wrote an entire blog on this called How Men Can SHOW UP In Their Marriages so read that after you finish reading this.
6) DON’T BE RUDE
If she is in the room or in the car and she is listening to something or looking at something don’t you come in the room interrupting it and changing it. I know you think you own all things electronic in the house or the car, but if she is having a moment with Scandal, or HGTV then let her be great in the moment!
7) DON’T VOLUNTEER HER SERVICES
Okay fellas just because your wife is the best baker in the world doesn’t mean she wants you to nominate her to bake the cupcakes for all of the team functions. Just because she is a great host, it doesn’t mean she wants to always have to host which includes cooking, cleaning, and turning on her happy wife attitude. So the next time the conversation about a Christmas party or birthday party comes up, DO NOT volunteer her and your home without first discussing it with her.