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Be willing to be vulnerable
The first step in being completely truthful on this subject with your spouse is to open yourself up to vulnerability. This requires being able to trust yourself and your spouse with things you’ve never talked about before. Be willing to bare yourself (literally and figuratively) forgetting any imperfections you think you may have. Your spouse loves you and won’t care about those things anyway.
Discover what you like
Pay attention to what you like about intimacy then start a conversation with your spouse about what you learned.
Give him feedback
Guys like to be told what they do well. Don’t we all? So begin the conversation with a compliment, telling him what you like about having s*x with him. If you just jump right in to all the things you need him to do differently, he might feel like he’s been unable to satisfy you in the past. Be gentle with his feelings, as you’d like him to be with yours. Guys can feel vulnerable discussing this subject, too.
Don’t be too serious
s*x isn’t supposed to be serious, solemn business. It’s about fun, intimacy and love. It’s all right to make mistakes and laugh at yourself. Sometimes a dose of humor is what you need to relax and really enjoy the experience. Nothing is more damaging to a healthy s*xual response than stress or tension.
Understand it’s a learning process
Things won’t instantly be better after one conversation about s*x. Remember this will be an ongoing process as you each come to know one another better. Your guy will still make mistakes along the way, but those are just opportunities to explain yourself better and you’ll grow closer together as you problem-solve. Pleasure from s*x isn’t a one-way street. Wives should have a fulfilling, satisfying intimate experience. Men don’t automatically know what to do, though, so it’s up to you to teach him what you like. Every woman is different, and there’s no perfect way from point A to point B, but with patience and love, you’ll find talking about s*x will get easier and easier. And of course, you both will enjoy yourselves more, too.