Nigerian Pastor Questions His Faith

Faith gives meaning, importance and comfort to one’s life. A person realizing they have started losing faith in God might feel disturbed and lonely reader has started questioning his own faith and believes he does not have the right to lie to the people who see him as a man of God.

I’m a pastor and I’ve started to lose my faith. Every Sunday, I stand before my congregation and preach things I no longer believe in. I just can’t trust the God I’m praying to.

I felt the calling when I was a 6-year-old boy. I had questions, of course, sometimes even doubts. But I thought those would only strengthen my faith. However, when I became a pastor myself nine years ago, sharper questions have started coming to mind.

Would a loving God would torment innocent people, His own image, for eternity? Is there any evidence of God’s existence at all?

I have no one to talk to. That’s why I chose the anonymous way of confessing to thousands of people.

Nobody in family knows I’m having these kind of thoughts. I can’t even imagine to confide in anyone of my friends. I feel that one day, I’ll just leave my job and even relocate to other part of Nigeria.

I just cannot be one of those sheep who follow blindly, without knowing the truth. I don’t know anymore if I even miss “talking to God” and if it’s worth trying to become a born-again believer. I also don’t like the idea of lying to people. What do I do? HELP!