The last thing we want when we find someone that we really like is to discover that we were just being used…but it does happen. As cruel, selfish and immature as it may be and seem, the truth is- there are people out there who will use others to fulfill their own selfish needs, whether it is for s*xual purposes, money, free dates, temporary companionship, etc. It is very common for some to choose the path of denial when they see the red flags that they are being used, because they do not want to believe the person they like actually is using them, nor do they want to believe that they could fall victim to such a thing.being used
Denying the truth is helping no one, especially you. If you suspect you are being used for anything, you should become more alert and observant of the relationship you really have with this person and collect the facts, so that if you are being used, you can put an end to it as soon as possible.
Here are some signs that point to the possibility that you are most likely being used:
You mainly just have s*x-
No matter how amazing the s*xual connection may be between you and another person, a relationship should not be mainly a s*xual one. There is more to a relationship and you should be connecting in more ways than just sexually. You two should be going out on dates, talking and getting to know each other on deeper levels. If you are mainly meeting up at each other’s homes for some talking and s*x, then there is a high chance that you are being used for s*x.
The Relationship does not move beyond dates-
Okay, we all know that every relationships starts with dating, so in the beginning you will go out on dates such as out to dinners, movies and other places of interest. This all fine and good, but if after a while you find yourself still in the dating stage, only seeing this person when you go out to treat him or her to dinner, movies, etc- then it is possible that you are being used for free dinners, movies and other treats. When a real relationship is building, the two of you will want to see more and more of each other, outside the dating scene. You will want to hang out at each other’s homes and have intimate experiences (both physically and emotionally), meet each other’s friends and/or family and eventually agree that you are in an official relationship. If you cannot get this person to get officially involved with you, but he or she does not mind you to keep taking him or her out on dates here and there, beware!
You find yourself loaning more and more money-
There is nothing wrong with helping someone out with money once in a while, especially if it is someone you really like and have a strong romantic interest in. We all could use some help sometimes and helping each other out is wonderful. There is a limit however, on how much money you keep loaning someone- no matter how much you like them, especially if they are not really paying back the loans. If you are seeing someone and their asking to borrow money becomes more frequent without giving you much in return relationship wise, then there is a good chance that you are being used for money and you should then stop giving him or her money to see and find out whether they will really stick around once the money lending stops.
You mainly hang out when he/she is bored or has nothing else to do-
Naturally, you are going to want to spend as much time as possible with the person you are interested in, but are the feelings mutual? If the person you are seeing makes a lot of excuses for not seeing you (they are busy, already have plans, something came up, etc) and seems to only see you at the last when minute when he or she has some time, then it is possible that you are being used for company when he or she has nothing else to do that they consider more important. Really watch out for this, because if a person is really that into you, they will want to spend as much time with you as possible and will not keep making excuses