Do you feel like your relationship is on the rocks more than you want it to be? Do you feel like it could be ending sometime soon? Noticing signs of a possible breakup is not pleasant, but the reality is that sometimes relationships dwindle in passion and two people may begin drifting apart. If you have noticed some red flags and would like to save your relationship, you can put some extra time and energy into fostering a better connection and working out issues. Consider the following 6 tips for enhancing your relationship.
1. Stop pointing your finger.
The longer you’re in a relationship, the more you tend to notice character defects or idiosyncrasies in your partner. In the beginning of the relationship, those defects or annoyances were probably there but the fact that you were flying on Cloud 9 obscured your ability to see them. Once the honeymoon phase is over, it’s easier to notice flaws or personality annoyances and start pointing fingers. If you want to save your relationship, you must stop doing this. Focus on yourself and being the best partner you can be. Lavish love on your partner and disengage from judgment. You will most likely notice that your partner’s flaws seem less annoying and he will return more love and favor upon you as a result.
2. Remember the love you shared in the beginning.
Remember the first date, the first time you made love, the first romantic vacation you went on. What was it that attracted you to your man? Was it his confidence? His sense of humor? His spontaneity? Have you stopped spending quality time together? If so, do some of the things you used to do, as that may put some life back into your relationship. If you’ve stopped dating, go on some dates. If you used to have meaningful conversations regularly, go ahead and begin conversing as such again. Remembering the beginning sometimes will open your eyes as to how you’ve allowed the stresses and busyness of daily life to get in the way of your relationship. Once you see this, you can make some changes.
3. Kiss more often.
A passionate kiss can melt tension, built up stress, and negative emotions. Go ahead and make the effort to grab your guy regularly and really kiss him. I don’t mean a peck on the lips when he is walking out the door for work, I mean a one or two minute passionate, sensual kiss that he’ll remember throughout the day!
4. Get some couples counseling.
If you’ve tried your best to work out some issues that you’re having, consider seeing a couple’s therapist for a period of time. Sometimes it is best to get a third party involved that can offer great insight and accountability for each partner. Counseling can help you two communicate better and also feel safe to say things you might not feel safe saying when it’s just the two of you. Every relationship hits some bumps in the road and relationship counselors can help you identify and get over those bumps if you’re both willing to try.
5. Have some fun.
Couples that incorporate date night into their relationships tend to feel happier and their relationships tend to last longer. Sure, life gets busy, but you’ve got to make the time to invest in spending quality time together in order for your relationship to flourish. Plan some date nights and just have some fun together! Go bowling, see a movie, play miniature golf, go to dinner, dancing, or anything else that you might enjoy. Discuss what each of you would enjoy for dates and incorporate them regularly into your life.
6. Envision the best.
If you sit around writing sad love poems all the time because you’re feeling like your relationship is ending, it just might. Dwelling on the worst won’t do you any good. Be proactive in your relationship and envision the best. Do your part by being open and honest about your concerns, come up with a plan for bringing life back into the relationship, and invest your time and energy into reconnecting and enjoying each day as it comes.
There are sure to be obstacles or periods of stress in a relationship, but these do not mean that the relationship is headed for a break up. Take a positive approach and envision the best for you and your man. Chances are he wants to save your relationship just as much as you do.