In the past, I lost myself. With all the life clutter in my head about what I’m cooking for dinner, which child has to be where and at what time, and wondering if my husband is feeling good and loved, it’s no wonder I am sometimes left overwhelmed. As a busy, married mom, I know I’m not alone.
Balancing life, family and career is a juggling act, that if not managed properly, could push us over the edge. As a result, we may forget to actually slow down and take the necessary time we need to find ourselves. I’m discovering when I focus on me, even if just for a minute, the whole family benefits. When I feel good about myself, everyone else is able to experience the best of me.
As married mamas, each of us have personal goals and a desire to live a life that includes a little time to love on ourselves. That type of self-love is universal and should be a priority. Whether you feel as though you’ve lost your sexy, your drive or your energy, it’s time to reclaim it all. If it once belonged to you, it can again. Below is my personal plan to get my life and my sexy back.
1. Minimizing the amount of times the world sees you looking like a shlumpadinka is first on the list. It’s a word I’ve heard before and exactly how I feel when I leave my home looking any old kind of way. The better I look, the better I feel. Sexy to me is clothing that fits my body appropriately, a little mascara, lipstick and my big signature hair. Because every woman is different, our idea of sexy will also vary.
2. Find out what makes you feel your sexiest and rock it. Since time is of the essence for a married mom, preparing the night before might be necessary. It doesn’t matter if you’re heading to the grocery store or the daycare center, looking good is a great way to show the world you’re loving you.
3. Another awesome way to bring your sexy back is to play sexy theme songs (on repeat), which will be played whenever your mojo is starting to slip. There are certain tunes I hear that make me feel some kind of way, like Beyonce’s Drunk In Love and The Isley Brother’s Sensuality. In order to take advantage of my sexy moments, I have to get the children to bed early enough so I still have some energy.
4. Taking charge and bringing something new to your bedroom adventures also greatly contributes to those feelings of sexiness. If you’re searching for some new excitement, check out the variety of apps that highlight s*xual positions and foreplay fun.
5. Filling your treasure chest with sexy pieces that you can pull out at a moment’s notice, will also assist you in feeling like a grown and sexy mama.
6. Schedule appointments for time with yourself. Informing my family of the time I need to focus on me, or my business allows me the opportunity to be still in a nice quiet space. Carving out the time and explaining why I need it is crucial for me. I’m grateful that my family is understanding of my needs and allow me that time. Your relationships are stronger and your life is simply better when you are restored and rejuvenated.
7. Pencil yourself into your daily planner and promptly inform your family. Whether it’s 30 minutes or 2 hours, in a bubble bath or on the patio, take it and use it as you see fit. This time is a must and something we should no longer feel guilty about. If you’re just using that time to watch your favorite TV show, do it! You deserve it.
8. Think about your purpose and your life goals, create an action plan for your life and get busy. Remember, married mamas aren’t any good to anyone else if we’re burnt out and used up.
Source: blackandmarriedwithkids.com
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