{"id":418242,"date":"2011-05-05T22:18:49","date_gmt":"2011-05-05T22:18:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ghanamma.net\/2011\/05\/05\/water-for-elephants-review-animal-steals-show-from-robert-pattinson\/"},"modified":"2011-05-05T22:18:49","modified_gmt":"2011-05-05T22:18:49","slug":"water-for-elephants-review-animal-steals-show-from-robert-pattinson","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ghanamma.com\/2011\/05\/05\/water-for-elephants-review-animal-steals-show-from-robert-pattinson\/","title":{"rendered":"Water For Elephants review: Animal steals show from Robert Pattinson"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

By Chris Tookey<\/a>
Last updated at 11:18 PM on 5th May 2011<\/p>\n

Verdict:<\/span> Big top-notch production, rock-bottom script<\/p>\n

Rating: \"3<\/strong><\/p>\n

This\u00a0 is high romantic melodrama: Titanic on dry land, with the doomed liner turned into a Thirties travelling circus careering towards catastrophe.<\/p>\n

The film even uses a similar framing device to James Cameron\u2019s Oscar-winner, as one of the survivors, Jacob (played with plenty of ripe ham by Hal Holbrook), tearfully recalls the love of his life.<\/p>\n

In his youth, he\u2019s played by today\u2019s aspiring Leonardo DiCaprio, teen heart-throb Robert Pattinson. The young Jacob is a Polish-American whose veterinarian studies at Cornell University are halted by his parents\u2019 death in a car crash.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"More<\/p>\n

More fizzle than sizzle: Reese Witherspoon and Robert Pattinson fail to ignite the screen with any hint of chemistry<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

He is also made homeless when he discovers his mother and father ran into debt to finance his education and the bank forecloses. \u2018Perhaps, if you hadn\u2019t gone to college, you\u2019d still have a home,\u2019 gloats the banker in a moment that hints of even beastlier melodrama to come.<\/p>\n

The poor lad, stricken by grief, remorse and the Depression, hops on the first train through town. There\u2019s a moment of magic where the circus train pulls up and our awestruck young hero watches it disgorge its bizarre contents.<\/p>\n

The scene where scores of workers erect a big top and attendant sideshows conveys wonder, excitement and joy that are rare in modern cinema.<\/p>\n

It evokes old-fashioned Hollywood at its best, with epic production values and formidable organisation.<\/p>\n

\"The<\/p>\n

The real star of the show: Rosie the elephant outshines her dreary co-stars<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

To counter the glossiness, the film offers us a vision of Thirties capitalism red in tooth and claw, as sadistic circus boss August (played with magnificent menace by Christoph Waltz, revisiting his Oscar-winning role in Inglourious Basterds) exploits his workers, abuses his bareback-rider wife (Reese Witherspoon) and mistreats his animals, even his latest star, Rosie the elephant.<\/p>\n

The only surprise is that this volatile control-freak never actually straps anyone to the railway track. He does, however, throw old people off moving trains and indulges in more than his fair share of insane cackling.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s an immensely watchable performance and a lot more fun than Billy Zane\u2019s equivalent turn in Titanic.<\/p>\n

The same, sadly, cannot be said of the central couple. Witherspoon is perky and looks terrific in slinky gowns and Harlowesque platinum hair.<\/p>\n

But she\u2019s surprisingly inept as an emotionally damaged orphan with low self-esteem and a hint of sexual masochism. Nor is she convincingly enamoured of joyless Jacob, supposedly the love of her life.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Great<\/p>\n

Great costumes, shame about the acting: The film flops when it comes to the main duo, who are lumbered with some dreadful dialogue<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\u2018Where were you when I was 17?\u2019 she breathes. To which the only honest answer would be: \u2018Just out of nursery school.\u2019<\/p>\n

But the age difference of at least a decade isn\u2019t the only problem. I don\u2019t know how to say this without incurring the hatred of Pattinson\u2019s numerous young female fans, but he\u2019s not yet a very good actor. He\u2019s stiff and self-conscious \u2014 and more than a little dull.<\/p>\n

Waltz may be the villain, but at least his character has inner life \u2014 a manic, crackling energy. The perpetually ponderous Pattinson appears to have some kind of inner death.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

Fortunately, all is not lost. He is handsome and there are signs of a better actor within.<\/p>\n

He does shake himself out of his self-absorbed torpor in his tender scenes with Rosie the elephant, a sweet, effortlessly charismatic presence. In a movie full of self-conscious acting, hers is the least elephantine performance.<\/p>\n

Of course, she has the advantage of not having to speak any of the dreadful dialogue.<\/p>\n

Pattinson is lumbered with pretentious vacuities such as \u2018I don\u2019t know if I picked that circus, but something told me that circus picked me\u2019; and outright rubbish such as \u2018You\u2019re a beautiful woman, you deserve a beautiful life\u2019, which made me wonder if he\u2019s the kind of twerp who thinks ugly people deserve ugly lives.<\/p>\n

\"Not<\/p>\n

Not much more than a pretty face: Pattinson’s fans may be blind to the heartthrob’s dull presence, but for the rest of the audience it is blindingly obvious<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

An early clue that Witherspoon\u2019s brain is not entirely on the job either comes when she orders Jacob to assist her on board Rosie for the first time by saying: \u2018Can you help me with this ladder?\u2019 This is a line permissible on radio, but can\u2019t be justified when we can see Jacob is unlikely to be confused by the identity of that convenient wooden thingy with rungs.<\/p>\n

Even more idiotic is the moment when she whispers alluringly to Jacob: \u2018Bring Rosie to my tent and don\u2019t tell anyone\u2019 \u2014 as if the surest way to avoid suspicion on the way to an illicit tryst is to arrive clutching a large pachyderm.<\/p>\n

Not having read Sara Gruen\u2019s novel, I don\u2019t know how many of the fatuities are her fault and how many adaptor Richard LaGravenese\u2019s. But I\u2019m sure her book will have made more of the colourful supporting characters and the gritty detail of circus life.<\/p>\n

What is glaringly obvious is that Francis Lawrence, whose previous films were sci-fi thrillers Constantine and I Am Legend, has more flair for pretty visuals than for pace or story-telling.<\/p>\n

By the end, he seems to have run out of interest. The climactic disaster is disappointingly perfunctory.<\/p>\n

All the same, there\u2019s plenty of retro charm to this movie and exquisite craftsmanship. I could happily see it again for Jacqueline West\u2019s costumes. Jack Fisk\u2019s production design is as superb as you would expect from a man whose credits include Mulholland Drive and There Will Be Blood.<\/p>\n

There\u2019s also excellent cinematography by Rodrigo Prieto, whose pictures include Amores Perros and Brokeback Mountain. All three might have been up for Oscars next year, had the film itself been more memorable.<\/p>\n

Where it falls down is this: how can you become immersed in a romantic melodrama when you don\u2019t believe the central characters really feel anything for each other?<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

Read more:
\nWater For Elephants review: Animal steals show from Robert Pattinson<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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