HELP! I Am Afraid Of s*x
I am a 20-year-old boy. I have never had a serious relationship with a girl and I have never had s*x before.
My question is, would girls be turned off by my virginity? Should I just get it out of the way or is it okay to keep waiting as long as I have to? When I do finally meet the “right” girl should I tell her or keep it a secret? All this wondering just drives me nuts.
I have never met a girl who would dislike a guy for being a virgin, but all my stupid guy friends think I’m weird and that I’d be more of a man if I just got it over with, even if it doesn’t mean anything. I feel all this pressure from society that I can’t wait just because I’m not supposed to. I’m afraid what if I don’t meet the right person ever, I don’t want to be the 40 year old virgin.
Here’s the ultimate irony, and a really humiliating story, but I’m telling it: sometimes when I’m alone and feeling lonely I want s*x so bad I can’t stand it, I feel like I’m going to explode. To the point where I look on social network (facebook) for hookups and then feel great shame after. But when I actually had a chance to get it out of the way last 2 years, I didn’t do it because I didn’t feel anything for the girl, it would have just been a meaningless hook-up.
I got scared and couldn’t do it and ran away. I felt like the biggest loser in the world. I want to feel like it’s okay to wait, but practically everything else in the world is telling me it isn’t. I am now in a university in Malaysia and almost all my friends are calling me names, insulting me even to the extent of paying for prostitutes for me to have s*x with but i keep on avoiding, Please help me.