Dating a musician can be somewhat different than dating a non-musician. Such movies as ‘Rock Star’ and ‘Almost Famous’ have painted the ups and downs of life on the road in a traveling band, but being in a relationship with a musician can vary depending on your mate. Following are some things to think about before dating a musician seriously.
1. Their Work Hours When the 9-5ers are working, musicians are off work. When the office folk are off on the nights and weekends, musicians are typically working. One thing to think about when dating a musician is how much you want to see him, and in what capacity. If you don’t mind hanging out at the gig with his friends, or waiting for him at home, then great. If you want to go away a lot of weekends to a cabin or snuggle up on Friday nights, you might have to compromise.
2. Their Sleep Hours What sleep?!? Really, because of their often funky work schedules, musicians sleep when others are out and about. This may be 10 in the morning, or 3 in the afternoon before the gig. It can be dicey to live with a musician unless they’re a sound sleeper or have an awesome sound machine!
3. The Fans Fans are the reason musicians get booked, sell their CDs, and make a living at what they love most. But sometimes fans forget the boundaries they would usually respect with others. They just feel so close to the musician who has read their mind and put their thoughts into his lyrics. Fans may ignore you as you and your sweetheart are out and about, or they may be disrespectful. Other times, they may embrace you as one of their own. Either way, this is a conversation you need to have with your love before you get too serious. Discuss ways to handle issues before they occur.
4. The Parties There are after parties, rehearsal parties, and just because parties with musicians. Many of their friends are musicians too, and they love to play their passion. Your basement may turn into party central, or there may be parties in the middle of the week for you and your musician sweetheart to attend. Before you get serious, make sure you are truly comfortable with this, whether you attend the parties with him or not.
5. The Romance There are few things more romantic in this world than a musician singing words of love to his darling in a room of sighing onlookers. Yes, the romance can be real and true on his part. Just make sure you are swooning for him and not the gestures. Do you complement each other, share the same outlook on life, want some of the same important parts of life? Romance is delicious frosting on the cake of life. Just make sure the cake is your taste.
6. Their Focus Depending on where you musician is in his career, he may be completely focused on his art, and making it his career. With the odd working hours and the extra work of marketing himself, his focus may be intently elsewhere. Just know it has nothing to do with you—being an artist is a respectable and tough profession.
7. Their Home A musician’s home can be a crash pad for visiting artists, a rehearsal studio, a counseling office, and a restaurant. Understanding that sensitive artistic musicians open themselves to the needs of others may explain why there is often someone camped out on their couch. This is something to consider when spending time in your musician man’s home. Musicians are a wonderful, creative, thoughtful people. They have beautiful qualities, as well as some considerations many can barely imagine. In the end, it’s about the individual. Know your mind, speak it to your guy, and hope he does the same. In the end, if it’s meant to be, you will find a way! What is your favorite thing about dating a musician?