The bad boy tamed by the right girl has long been a cliché in movies and on TV. From Joey from Friends to Barney in How I Met Your Mother, the promiscuous man who prefers commitment-free hook-ups is shown to be perfectly willing to change his philandering ways once he realizes how unfulfilled he is. In reality, there are plenty of men out there who simply don’t want a serious relationship or don’t want one with you. If you’re looking for a serious relationship, it’s important to be able to tell the difference between a relationship with potential, and one that’s unlikely to develop into anything more. Here are four tell-tale phrases that suggest he won’t be changing his ways any time soon.
1. “I think it’s too soon for you to meet my family” If a guy is serious about you, he’ll want you to meet his family as soon as possible. He might be nervous about the meeting, because he wants it to go well, but he won’t fob you off with excuses any time you suggest seeing them.
2. “I don’t think you’d like my friends” If it seems that he really doesn’t want you to meet his friends, it suggests that they either don’t know you exist, or that he has given them a very different impression of what kind of relationship you have. Either way, it’s not a good sign for the future of your relationship.
3. “I’m not looking for anything serious” Perhaps the old cliché of bad boy tamed is to blame, but many women don’t believe what they hear when a man says he’s not looking for a serious relationship. They make the classic mistake of thinking that things will change when he realizes just how much they mean to him, and hanging on in the hope that he will eventually fall head-over-heels in love. If you met using online dating, it should be clear whether he is after something serious or not. Most men won’t lie about what they are looking for. So if he says “I’m not looking for anything serious” he means just that. Take it as a clear sign and don’t waste any more time with him. If you feel you are attracting the wrong type of man, you could try a site such as eHarmony who match people according to their values and beliefs. This way, you can be sure from the outset that you’re both looking for the same things.
4. “Let’s just be spontaneous” While being spontaneous can be very exciting and romantic, it’s not a good sign if he doesn’t ever want to make solid plans with you. If he’s developing serious feelings for you, he’ll want to make as many plans as possible so he always knows when he’ll be seeing you next. If he’s seeing a few other girls, he might be waiting to see what other offers he gets before committing to anything. This ‘spontaneity’ could also be another way of saying ‘let’s just hook up whenever I feel like it.’